Brentology.com

Was feeling sickly, germy, nasaly, and sleepy this weekend, even Jeff came down with a case of the sicks for which he is blaming me. Today I took the day off to rest and now I'm feeling better. Not 100%, but much better.

Got a call tonight and the caller ID indicated it was from the head honcho of my company. Serioulsy, this is the big cheese. Hmm cheese wonder if I have any. Anyway since I caled off sick today and this person is caling me at home in the evening it freaked me out a bit as I decided whether I wanted to answer or let it go to voice mail. I mean I have sick leave banked up the wazoo after six years of hardly ever using it so could I really be getting chewed out or fired via phone?? Then I realized the phone was still ringing while I was imagining the worst so I answered. Turns out another manager wanted to play an April Fool's prank on me tomorrow and enlisted her help. She was calling me to see if I wanted to join her in turning it around on him. Not wanting to tell her I was going to call off tomorrow too, I said "absolutely, sounds like fun" in my most kiss-ass yet still nasaly voice. So now I have to go to work tomorrow and basically play along with her, take it too far, pitch a fit and walk out -- that type of thing as the original prankster thinks it is blowing up in his face. Gee I wonder if I can muster up the inspiration to be pissed off at work?

Posted by Brent at 09:13 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

There is no industrial strength Kleenex so only Bounty extra strength will do.

Just a little visual for you today.

Posted by Brent at 10:29 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

I am sick again! Am I germ motel? Am I a petri dish for some comic lab experiment? Am I delirious from over medicating? Woke up this morning with a sore throat and spent the day at work stuffed up with my head feeling like it weighs 237 pounds. I can't call off as I am the only manager there this week. I have spent the evening since I got home asleep on the couch and am on my way to bed now. Maybe 14 hours of sleep is what I needed. What I didn't need is to be #$*&*$% sick again! UGH

Posted by Brent at 09:54 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

On the next page so I could warn you. If you find peepshows too offensive, do not click on the link --- otherwise enioy...

Posted by Brent at 10:19 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

Hope everyone has a happy Easter. I love easter because I love jelly beans, peanut butter eggs, and getting easter goodies of which I am told there is a package from Michigan waiting for me Alison's house (thanks Grace!). Jeff and I are heading to dinner at Alison and Pauls tonight along with friends of theirs for a holiday meal. Yesterday Jeff and I went to a get together at one of his relatives house and had some good food and adult beverages while watching the kids do an easter egg hunt in the yard. That was fun and I met a whole bunch of people whom I will never be able to remember all their names but hopefully be able to recognize when I see them again. We watched Pitt lose to MSU last night, Jeff was bummed as he is a huge fan of Pitt basketball. Other than that, kind of a nice quiet weekend.

Posted by Brent at 03:45 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Pet cutness below

One ear up is all I need to listen

The Blair Finnigan Project

Again, really? Just let me sleep

Finnigan loves the paperazzi

Posted by Brent at 03:36 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

And my tongue can't leave it alone.

Perhaps I should explain.....At lunch today while inhaling what I must have thought to be the last slice of pizza ever again to be made in this lifetime as I went after it with the appetite of Oprah after a morning of fasting, I somehow bit the inside of my mouth right behind my lower lip. Now there is a bump/sore that just calls out to my tongue and teeth to play with. I can't leave it alone, it's like an OCD in my mouth. And of course it's not going to get better if I don't leave it alone, but without realizing it, all of the sudden there is a party going on in my mouth and my brain was not invited. To others I probably look like a cow chewing cud.

Posted by Brent at 10:32 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

At my job an African American gets invited (and paraded as he describes it) to various "diversity" events by the big wigs. Another coworker gets the same type of invites because of her religion. And while they may not like it too much, it is an opportunity for them to have face time and recognition from our "leaders." And here I sit in all my caucasian-ness with no religious interests. Well I'm just gonna start my own club, some kind of sarcastic bastard type organization. Except I would probably be the only member because I would just mock anyone wanting to join.

Where do I get my bailout by the Fed? How F'd up are the financial markets in this country? It seems that my balanced portfolio of dreams, penny jar, and lottery tickets once again proves to be the prudent strategy.

Posted by Brent at 09:49 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

...And the fucked up fucks who create it....

So the Govenor of New York has been caught hiring high priced hookers. Knocked off his high horse, he is "sorry" and most likely will have to resign. What is with politicians? Hookers, adultery, bathroom stalls, teenage pages, etc. I mean holy bajebus, how can people be so unbelievably stupid. Is it ego, power trips, a sense of untouchability? Probably a combination of all. Ironically these are usually people telling the rest of us how to act and live.

An Oklahoma lawmaker is warning her constituents that gays are taking over and have become more dangerous to the American way of life than terrorists. Rep. Sally Kern, an obvioulsy bright woman with no mental issues of her own other than a minor case of Bitchitis, says "The homosexual agenda is destroying the nation." Now this terrorist missed the last Homo meeting but I got a copy of the agenda, and plans for destroying the nation was actually tabled until a future meeting as everyone needed to get home for the Project Runway finale. So clearly this yapping yenta knows not what she speaks about. But what makes her a candidate for stupid-tard of the year is that she claimed that she did not know her hate speech, that she was making in a planned public speaking engagment, was being recorded. Perhaps she can ride the short bus all the way to Hell.

A Hillary and Obama ticket is being brought up more and more. Unfortunetly it's by pundits and not by the candidates. It would be a dream team. There would be some jealously over who looks better in a suit, Obama has the slender hips but Hillary works the blazer in true presidential style. But that shouldn't get in the way of running the nation, there are more important issues after all, like coming up with super weapons in the fight to get rid of gay terrorists.

Posted by Brent at 09:38 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

...like a combination of floor and counter cleaners, cake, and fresh basil and garlic. This is because I am cooking tonight for Jeff, Alison, and Paul. I made pesto, fresh of course, hence the strong smell of basil. Also as part of my resolve to bake more, I made a pineapple upside down cake. It has not been tasted yet, but I'm hoping it will be yummylicious.

The clean odor comes from me giving the place a good cleaning today. Ironically, doing what I think is a good cleaning job makes me see just how much more cleaning I need to do more often. I'm pretty clean and I don't like clutter so overall on a regular basis the apartment is fairly spiffy. But things like keeping up with soap scum in the tub and pulling out pieces of furniture to dust behind need to be more of a priority. I would hate for the dust bunnies behind teh TV cabinet form an alliance with the ones behind the couch and attack me.

Posted by Brent at 06:05 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

I have a fairly new employee that cries just about everyday. She has issues doing the basic functions of her job, which is not exactly rocket science, and responds with mini blubbering fits. She is struggling so much I'm convinced she is just not the right kind of person for this job. How does one train or manage an adult who tears up if she blinks too fast much less when I have to correct her.

Oh, did I mention that she is the Niece of our HR person? I love love love my job. I wish I could work 23.5 hours a day.

Posted by Brent at 09:38 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Neat

Posted by Brent at 09:32 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Lots to say but lazy, will catch up real soon.

Had good weekend, Me, Jeff, Paul, and Alison celebrated Alison's birthday by going out to dinner and then Starbucks for dessert. Good food and good conversation with the birthday girl.

Now the kids...

Blood Rushing To Head

Need Longer Bed

Is Someone At The Door?

Sleepy

Posted by Brent at 05:15 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)