Brentology.com

So another day in the daily drama circus that is my job has produced an interesting occurance. A complaint letter was sent into our main website about yours truly. Now in my position I get to deal with my fair share of loonies and pissed off people. But this person was so over the top her letter could not be taken seriously. (If you ever want to be taken seriously by a company you are complaing to, just be factual and to the point because ramblings just get laughed at.) It was a rambling diatrabe that went on and on claiming that when she called in on three occasions I just laughed at her, among other things. I'm sure I was laughing at her in my head, but not outright. Anyway, long story short she demanded a few things in response. Two of them included a formal apology from me and then she demanded I be fired and called me the banks worst enemy. I'm drafting the apology now, but this is all I came up with: